42 Million Dead In Bloodiest Black Friday Weekend On Record...The Onion
- I'll be frank. I thought there would be more Knock Out Game stories today. I expected reports of families members taking out a can of woop-ass on the family knucklehead who thought bringing up Obamacare at Thanksgiving dinner would be a good idea (the Obama administration thought it was). I suspect it happened, but the incidents were rare. In fact, some in the media are reporting the Knockout Game is a myth. I have a suggestion for those nitwits: YouTube.
- Thanksgiving is one of several times a year most families can get together and share time together (although more recently, it's becoming a time when family members sit around and constantly look at their cell phones). It's also a time of giving and appreciating the many blessings we have.
- If that's the case, why do so many shoppers turn into the Taliban during the holiday shopping season? Violence is flaring up at numerous shopping venues throughout the country.The mayhem is increasingly becoming an uncontrollable virus.
- Outside of Chicago, someone believed to be a shoplifter, was shot after dragging a police officer through the parking lot of Kohl's department store.
- In Realto, CA, several shoppers got into fist fights because other shoppers were cutting into line. A police officer was injured in that incident as he intervened.
- In VA, two men were arrested in a stabbing incident. They were allegedly arguing over a parking space (This was does not surprise me. Violence over parking spaces is a daily occurrence especially among the geezer crowd.
- If you think these are isolated incidents, all you need to do is check out social media. Twitter and other social media sites are now tracking all the pandemonium today. In fact, Black Friday's shopping frenzy is so widespread there's actually a web site--- BlackFridayDeathCount---that tracks injuries and deaths. As of this moment, no deaths have been reported. But it's still early.
- Perhaps people go shopping on Black Friday---not only to get some good deals on merchandise and spend money they don't have on crap they don't need---many are probably just thankful they survived Thanksgiving dinner with their family and friends---and not having to pull out the can of woop-ass.
